Thursday, February 6, 2014

Writing, the experience

I've experienced so many emotions as I write. It's amazing the things that go through your mind as you push out that story. You know what I'm talking about if you're a writer. Sometimes it's that feeling that makes you think you're going crazy. Ok, so maybe not every writer experiences this, but I do and I've talked to several authors who say the same thing. Here's what I'm talking about. It's the feeling of getting lost in the story. You get filled with the characters emotions and actions. It takes over your brain and at times you have to shake your head to get it out. I've been so lost in my writing that I'd block out everything around me. My family sometimes have to actually nudge me because I can't hear them. One of my books has a kidnapping section in it and when I was writing this scene I actually felt my heart racing with fear. It was as if I was feeling the fear my character felt. I know it sounds crazy, but it's the emotional bond you have with the characters you write. When the character was rescued I actually sighed with relief. Then you have those moments when you're out somewhere or working at your day job and the writing bug hits. It's like the flu. It hits quickly and rapidly takes your thinking processes away from what you're doing. The symptoms can range from breaking out into a sweat, intense staring (Nobody or no one person is immune to that stare), itchy fingers, the loss of logical speaking, and then the immense need to find something, anything to write on. It can be a napkin, envelope, gum wrapper(that's not the best thing but it works), or any writing surface that presents itself in front of you. I have notes everywhere, it's crazy. Of course the worst feeling for a writer is the dreaded writer's block. You're sitting there writing and all of a sudden you lose the whole feeling for the story. Your mind goes completely blank. It's as though the book in your mind has been erased and all you see is a blank page. You sit with your fingers poised above the keyboard, you break out into a sweat, you're disoriented and confused about the new feeling, then you get concerned. Maybe you have a deadline and this is not the time to draw a complete blank. The funny thing is minutes earlier your brain had the whole story completely outlined and now NOTHING! The best feeling to me is when you hit publish. Of course it's the most scariest feeling too. You're euphoric at finishing your baby that you've fed, cleaned and babied for what seems like forever and then you have to send it away. Then it hit's you, oh my goodness I just finished a novel and put it in someone's hands. Now you wait. You wait for the responses, the sales (this you just hope to see something), the criticism, and the rewards. Hitting that publish button can cause you a moment of every emotion imaginable. For me it's really a strange feeling when someone you don't know comes up to you in a store or event and says 'hey, you're that romance writer'. I know I turn red as a beet. I'm not a person that loves for someone to shower me with praises. I'm a shy person at those times. I get embarassed and excited all at the same time. Of course the hidden diva inside is jumping up and down, squealing with delight, but I'm not a diva on the outside by no means. There are so many emotions and experiences a writer goes through. It's different for everyone, but it all comes down to the experience of a writer. I love being a writer and expressing my love for the craft. It brings me great joy and it's a thing of pride to hold a finished book in my hands. I hope you find the joy of writing that I've found. Smile, someone might be reading your finished book at this very moment. You may be changing someones life with your writing. If you've been holding back on pushing that publish button then you're not giving yourself enough credit. Do it. You'll feel better after you do. As always, good writing and May God Bless You...